March Update

CPP EPIC

Campus ministry has been especially fruitful in this past month! Honestly there were and will continue to be times where it feels as though my work and effort loses meaning, and I question why I am doing what I do, but God has and will continue to be faithful. In the midst of my doubts, God graciously and continually encourages me through my students and the work he is doing in them!

We have continued to meet in person for the most part and the students continue to step deeper into intentional community with each other and are pointing one another upwards.

Spring Break Trip

A large chunk of this month was dedicated to planning and organizing our yearly Spring Break Retreat. In past years, this was a time for students to gather with the unified purpose of evangelizing and recruiting students to Epic on other campuses(UC Irvine, SDSU); however, this year was different. Due to COVID circumstances, many aspects of the structure of the retreat had to be changed. We could not stay at a local church and would have been a burden to other ministries(bringing a large group of people to ‘help’ them while potentially infecting them felt unwise). In addition, our size has decreased significantly since then(around half as many students as 2019 signed up). It was a decision I personally had a hard time embracing but we shifted our focus inwards rather than out. The goal was to give the students space, time, and direction to nurture their relationship with the Lord and with each other. It was a blessing witnessing this come to fruition.

The role Joel and I had in this retreat was more hand-on than I had expected. Rather than delegating the majority of responsibilities to students, we took on most of the major responsibilities. This was a by product of our decision to have a smaller planning team of students with the hope that more students would be able to rest and enjoy the weekend. This ended up teaching me a valuable lesson and humbling me greatly.

In the planning process, I began to form in my mind an image of how things would play out and how I wanted everything to go. My honest desire was for every student to have a great experience because I had such fond memories of retreats from my time as a student. I didn’t want anything to go wrong or be subpar because so many students committed their time and finances entrusting us to lead them well. Even for the responsibilities we asked students to handle, I found myself pridefully thinking of aspects I would change or do differently if I were in control. As I sat with these feelings during the retreat, I began to realize my desperation to create and enjoyable time was taking priority over actually witnessing the students grow together. As God humbled me and I took a step back, I was able to watch God work. I also began to understand and realize that while different, each students way of leading stemmed from compassion and was very well thought out. Honestly I felt terrible for not considering that earlier and being so tunnel visioned on my way. I left the retreat feeling so proud of the way so many students stepped up and displayed God’s love to one another in ways that I could never. I still have a long way to go but God revealed to me that I desire to control the results and have to learn to trust them to Him. I will continue to strive to do my best and lead well but I am learning to find peace and rest in His sovereignty.

Also no one got COVID praise God but a bee stung my toe while we played soccer together on the beach and it hurt a lot.

Prayer Requests

Wisdom in finishing the school year well, delegating leaders for next school year
For students going on missions this summer
That students(and I) would continue to learn to see God has been and will always be Lord of all
For the health of my roommates and I (two of the housemates tested positive for COVID)
For my home church community
For Jessica to settle in well and be surrounded by a loving, God centered community here in LA